Becky says things about … not saying things

I just wanted to say hello, really.


Stickman says hello, too. Oh, and he’s bought you some flowers. How terribly thoughtful.


I’ve been away for far too long. I haven’t said things, I haven’t even particularly thought things, and I’ve generally been rather remiss about the whole damn matter. This is clearly unacceptable, and I have given myself a serious talking to, the sort of talking to that involves staring at myself in the mirror and saying very sternly ‘Listen, Becky – if that’s even your name – you have to say more things’, which is totally normal human behaviour and everybody does it.


And to those magnificent and probably very pretty people who followed my blog specifically to hear me say things, and then I stopped saying things – well. If we were in a relationship, I’d take you out for an expensive meal, offer you mouthfuls from my plate without expecting mouthfuls from your plate in return, pay for everything, buy you a massive box of chocolates, tell you you get more beautiful every day, give you a foot rub and apologise for being a massive idiot.


But as we’re not in a relationship – at least, not one in which foot rubs are appropriate, no matter how much we wish they were – all I can say is: PLEASE FORGIVE ME. I am repentant (I nearly said ‘repugnant’ in a fit of silly confusion – but yes, I’m repugnant as well, for treating you so abominably), and I hereby promise to say things on a far more regular basis and to get Stickman out to play with his chums, because he’s recently been spending all his time playing video games and watching old episodes of Magnum PI, and I keep having to tell him to shave off his Tom Selleck-style moustache because it looks frankly ridiculous.


Of course, if you couldn’t care twopence whether I say things or not, that’s fine as well. All I’ll say is you just don’t know what life can be like when I do say things. It’s a beautiful world out there. Come with me into a realm of said things, join me in a discourse of profundity and banter, together we can fill the world with things to say! WHO’S WITH ME???



18 thoughts on “Becky says things about … not saying things

  1. And Becky did return, and she did say things, and the force of her voice did blow the tumbleweeds hither and yon across the bloggy plain! And the followers were mightily pleased. (At least this one is!)

  2. Becky saying things about not saying things beats just about anyone else saying things about anything. I hung out with Arto last night and he spoke of your “men watching sports” post, saying “anyone who can make me laugh while they’re making fun of people like me deserves all the credit in the world.”

    1. Haha! And that’s just about the biggest compliment anyone can pay me! Cheers Dave – hopefully this is the beginning of me saying many more things about things, and also hearing a fine plethora of funny names! 🙂

      1. We’re glad to have you back, buddy! (I pledge to use that term more while communicating with you. I love how much humor you derived from a term I’d never thought twice about)

        Please know that if you’re ever interested in guest posting, we’d love to have you! We’ve opened up to 4 once-a-month columnists in addition to the three of us regulars. Some Becky magic would be very much appreciated if you’re so inclined! 🙂

        1. I would love to do a guest post at some point! Becky magic + funny names magic = MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF MAGIC 🙂 What happens with guest posting (never done it before, bit of a blogging loser) – do I do a post in the style of your blog?
          And I LOVE the word buddy, but bud’s even better. So you’re my bud. Ok? 🙂

          1. Alright bud. Sounds good!

            Basically what would happen is I’d give you access to the blog at either “Author” or “Editor” level, and then you’d draft a post. Thursdays are fair game for anyone (Amber has a lot to say so usually does her once-a-month Tuesday post and then at least one or two Thursday posts in between), but there are always a few vacant Thursdays.

            You’d do a post for the Blog of Funny Names, in the style of our blog, with a delightful Becky twist (perhaps a stick figure or two) to ensure MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF MAGIC!

            Then you could reblog it to your page as well once it has been posted. People are free to comment on either version – the one on our blog or the reblogged one on yours.

            It’s fun… I’ve guest posted for Amber before, and we’ve had a few people guest post on ours. Also helps expose your writing to a new audience and move you one step closer to world domination… but more importantly, it’s fun! Sound good, bud?

            No pressure or urgency, just whenever you’d be interested, we’d love to have you! Who doesn’t want MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF MAGIC in their lives?!?

  3. Things will be said, in a time when they are available for the saying and not a moment before. This is meant to be deep and meaningful, like a foot massage from some flowers.

  4. We don’t have the kind of relationship that requires footrubs? Man, glad I didn’t see this right before Valentines day; I’d no doubt be hanging from a ceiling somewhere. Buy me a car.

YOU say things!

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