Becky says things about … publishing a book

Oh, sweet, patient Listeners. I have not entered the hallowed sphere of blogging for over two months.

But I have an excellent excuse.

No, I have not been trapped in my wardrobe after burrowing too far into it in an attempt to locate Narnia – I have been SELF-PUBLISHING A BOOK.

cartwheel

Yes, dearest Listeners, I have been working on adapting some of the things I’ve said on this blog into a book, along with quite a lot of lovely new things to say especially for said book. It’s a book about the silliness of human existence: everything from monstrous things about working in an office, commuting, failed exercise attempts, bad habits, hangovers, to being a rubbish woman, the dentist and getting old.

The book is at the printers as we speak. I have just had to re-do my front cover, having realised – o, the horror – that

courier

Once the cover has been cleansed of this heinous rogue typeface, it shall be printed. I should have it early next week.

Here is a sneak preview of the front cover:

ridiculous cover

Look! Lots of little stickmen on the front of a book!

Soooo…. this totally means that you can BUY this book JUST IN TIME FOR CHRISTMAS!! How utterly brilliant is that?

You will be able to buy the book on here (once I work out how to set up a payment thing whatsit), and what a brilliant Christmas present! Buy it and shove it in someone’s Christmas stocking – OR treat yourself to the best toilet book you’ll ever buy.

I wrote this book because of you lot – you kept telling me I should turn my blog into a book, and now I’ve only gone and done it… so basically, it’s all your fault. Hurrah!

stickman3

Oh for God’s sake.

Yes, okay – sigh – Listeners, this book also features the star of the show, Stickman, using his best acting skills to get himself into all sorts of situations and illustrate my points far better than I could ever do using words alone. He has been an integral part of this project, and if he hadn’t been heavily involved I would be a miserable, wretched failure. He is literally the most prolific stick ever to be involved in a literary work of art, and I urge you to purchase this book for his stunning performance alone.

stickman4

Well I’ve done all right so far, Sticky.

So that’s it folks, watch this space… save a bit of cash for that last Christmas present (or the first Christmas present if, like me, you thought it was still April and literally cannot believe that OH MY GOD IT’S DECEMBER AND MY LIFE IS TRICKLING AWAY BEFORE MY VERY EYES) – and buy a silly little book full of words about our silly little life.

 

 

65 thoughts on “Becky says things about … publishing a book

  1. Hooray! I’m always looking for something new to amuse me before bedtime. There just aren’t enough funny people out there, and worse, sometimes I think I’m buying something funny… And it snot (see what I did there?) I’m comin fer yer book.

  2. How exciting! I’ve missed you and your little friend so I may just have to purchase this book. The cover is great! See how I was noncommittal about buying? Still, I might. For real.

  3. I am happy that Becky is saying things again. I love your blog and have missed it quite severely. Congratulations on the book. I am sure you’ve got a customer in me.

  4. Oooh! I’ve not been this excited about a forthcoming publication since I first heard about “How to Touch Type” back in the summer of 1988 (wild days).

    Love the many stickmen! Stickmen are the key to life, surely. Surely.

    1. I understand – I was pretty excited about the ‘How to Touch Type’ pamphlet as well, so I’m hoping my publication lives up to it!
      Stickmen are indeed the key to life. If only more people realised this 🙂

  5. Yay Becky! Though I don’t ‘know’ you, I’m happy to see this happen to someone I know. You should have stuck with Courier. People would’ve said you were being fabulously retro.

    Don’t call it a toilet book. Even in jest. That’s not funny. Do you know how hard it is to write a book? Yes, obviously you do. I’ll have no disrespectful words spoken, especially from the author.

    Would I be able to get a signed copy? You might think I jest but I’m serious. I’m a book collector from way (WAY) back and I have bookcases full of signed first editions. I’d like to add this tome but if it’s too much of a pain in the ass, that’s okay.

    1. Several things –
      1 – The Courier is here to stay! I couldn’t change the font as it kept making the cover go weird, so I’m stuck with Courier. RETRO!!
      2 – Point taken… from now on I shall merely say ‘Perfect for the shelf in your bathroom’ 😉
      3 – YES!! If you would like to purchase my book, then I am thrilled and humbled – and if you would like me to sign it, I am humbled, overwhelmed, and thinking that I must get a new pen to make my handwriting nice 🙂
      Thank you 🙂

  6. Becky… I am not surprised. It seems to be a hallowed tradition of many bloggers to get published.

    “…sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.”

    Ah, not quite, Señor Stickman.
    [linguistic nerd mode= on]
    Wit and sarcasm are variants of humo(u)r; see Online Etymology Dictionary: entry for humor, esp. the table listed from H.W. Fowler [“Modern English Usage,” 1926]. Note how humo(u)r and sarcasm compare and contrast to satire, sardonic, et al.

    [linguistic nerd mode=off]

  7. I fear it may not be in time now for those of us all the way down in Australia to receive it before Christmas! I’m sure I can find an excuse to buy it anyway though!

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